What Makes A Good Mother: 10 Lessons From Cookie Lyon

Cookie Gif Empire Hakeem
Cookie Gif Empire Hakeem

So what makes a good mother? It’s the rare mother who never experiences self-doubt.  After all, there is a long list of possible worries for mothers and mothers-to-be: Will I be a good mom? Will my baby be healthy? Will I have any free time?

Cookie From Empire Hakeem
Cookie From Empire Hakeem

Cookie From Empire Andre
Cookie From Empire Andre

Cookie From Empire Jamal
Cookie From Empire Jamal

No matter your child’s age, it’s human nature to compare how your kids are doing versus others.  This can make some of us believe that we are bad mothers.  Being a good mother is simple for those willing to focus on the basics.

One of the major challenges in learning how to be a better wife and mother is seeing things from other’s vantage point.  This is definitely a challenge that everyone’s favorite TV-mom, Cookie Lyon faces on the Empire TV show.  We know that Cookie spent 17 years in prison yet her actions have been praiseworthy since she has been released.

The amazing mother who gave birth to an Empire. Cookie’s quotes typically involve her explaining that she is the wrong B**** yet she has made numerous statements explaining how much she loves her family:

Cookie on Empire
Cookie on Empire

Whether it is because they are scared of here or truly adore her, the cast of Empire would agree that Cookie Lyon is a terrific mother.  While it is easy to criticize Lucious’ parenting skills, it is quite difficult to insult Cookie’s unique style of mothering.

Here’s how to be a Supermom like Cookie from Empire:

Be Supportive
Encourage and support your kids.  Help your child follow their dreams through powerful messages like, “I believe in you!”

Although she eventually speaks her mind about Hakeem calling his girl group ‘Rainbow Sensation‘ Cookie shows him that she believes in his abilities and is willing to help him achieve his goals.  Cookie’s support will motivate and inspire Hakeem. From Empire’s “Without a Country” episode:

Set Rules
If you fail to set rules when your child is young it will limit their ability to distinguish between right and wrong when you’re not around.

Cookie has experienced some difficulties with her youngest son, Hakeem. From Empire to Lyon Dynasty, Hakeem is always pushing his mother’s limits.  When Cookie decides that she has had enough of Hakeem’s disrespect she is forced to remind him that she has some rules in place.

Let Your Child Make Mistakes
If you protect your child from making mistakes or rescue them from the consequences you are just delaying them from learning the lessons they need to learn.

Cookie has to let Hakeem learn not to mix business and pleasure.  Although she warns him not to cross the line with Valentina, she understands that there is no way to learn from something without experiencing it.

Cultivate Independence in Your Children
Independence is a gift you give your children that they will cherish and benefit from their entire lives.   It’s not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings.

Cookie teaches her kids not to trust depend on anyone in this world as even your shadow leaves you when your in darkness.  When Cookie and Hakeem crash Leviticus, Cookie announces that Hakeem is coming out of his father’s shadow to develop his own style.

Embrace Change
The only thing that is constant is change, so you have to learn to embrace it.  Your child is growing, on the inside and outside.  As your child evolves you must embrace change by evolving right along with them.

When Cookie finds out that Jamal has started living with Michael she doesn’t show shock, denial, guilt or anger.  Cookie loves her son unconditionally and accepts him for who he is.

Be Patient
Mothering can be challenging but it is important to stay patient.  Patience is making the choice to control your emotions rather than letting your emotions control you.

Although Cookie would much rather be at Empire’s studios she lets Jamal know that she is willing to travel to a studio in worst condition that they have to pay to use.  Cookie understands that patience is the support of weakness whereas impatience is the ruin of strength.

One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what your children have to say.  Don’t listen with the intent to reply, listen with the intent to understand.

Listening is another lesson we can learn from Cookie. On Empire’s ‘Dangerous Bonds’ episode Cookie shows Jamal that she cares through her sharp listening skills.

Commit to Staying Connected

Separation happens therefore we must spend quality time to reconnect with our children.  Hug your child every morning and when you say goodbye.  When you’re reunited spend ten-fifteen minutes solely focused on your child.
Unlike Lucious, Cookie informs Andre that he can always come to Lyon Dynasty.  Despite being busy building her new label she sets time aside to solely focus on her oldest son’s concerns.

Be Consistent
Work to create consistency in your routine and ensure that your child understands your non-negotiable standards.  Whether it is maintaining rules or telling expressing how much you them: Spoil your children with consistency.
Cookie reminds Andre how much she loves him as he deal with his health concerns.  The flashback then shows that Cookie was sending the same messages to her sons 17 years prior.   

Don’t Try to be Perfect
Striving for perfection will make it difficult for your child to deal with the unpredictable occurrences of life.  Teach your child that it is better to understand that they are not perfect rather than spending their entire lives trying to be.

As Porsha explains, “Cookie did hard time” yet we still love Cookie. From Empire’s first season to the show’s current season, Cookie has show us that she was born to be real, not perfect.

What day does Empire come on?
As the week starts we begin to get excited about the next episode of Empire leading everyone to ask: ‘What day does Empire come on?’ Wednesdays on Fox.

What channel is Empire on?
The questions, ‘What channel is Empire on?’ reappears every Wednesday as we attempt to balance our busy lives and keep up with the cast of Empire. Empire is on Fox.

By Jason John

Jason John is based in Maryland and covers Empire BBK’s News and Entertainment. He was previously a producer for the mobile site, helping to present Empire BBK’s news report to readers. More