Saturday, October 15, 2016

'Empire' Season 3 Recap: "Cupid Kills" (Or "Lucifer Lyon")

Here we are again, joining the Lyon family for another week of drama on Empire Season 3. We start of with Andre, who is so smitten with Nessa that it looks like he saw the ghost of Rhonda. Shine, though, doesn't think love at first sight is good enough and wants to start a bidding war for Nessa's record deal. The game is on.

Lucious Hakeem Jamal Cupid Kills Empire
Lucious Hakeem Jamal Cupid Kills Empire

Hakeem streams on Empire Xtreme with a roast pig and Shine, who shows the world Empire's offer to Nessa in the bidding war. Meanwhile, Tiana faces pressure for a clapback track to address Hakeem's diss track. Later, Andre visits Nessa to convince her to sign with Empire and get rid of Shine. It turns from negotiation to out-right flirting. Shine doesn't take this well and he busts into Lucious' office, where he tames a gun-toting Shine with a Derek Jeter-signed bat.

Cookie gets a cute visit from Angelo and his mentee kids, who sing a little ditty for her. She says he reminds her of her ex Barry (get it, Barry — which is the nickname of President Barack Obama, who bares much resemblance to Angelo?). Her dad wanted her to choose the boring and nerdy, but endearing and safe Barry, but she was much more interested in the dangerous and unpredictable "Lucifer" Lyon, according to her dad. What a great nickame; wish it caught on.

Angelo asks Cookie to a concert and she preps for the date with a dress montage! But it turns out it's more of a "stuffy night at the opera" and everyone is dressed in white gowns and tuxes. Angelo, being a gentleman, doesn't care and appreciates Cookie's awesomeness. They take in the opera, which is about a woman caught between two men (ahem ahem).

Jamal once again visits Freda Gatz in prison, because he seems to love triggering his PTSD. She's beaten pretty badly and he shows a lot of compassion toward her, despite Lucious trying to keep her quiet. Later, Jamal gives Angelo advice on how to impress his mom and Jamal asks Angelo to get Freda out of jail due to the danger to her life in prison; she gets bail thanks to her new fancy lawyer, falsifying medical records, and Jamal's support. Later, Lucious confesses to Jamal that he had Freda beat up in jail and congratulates Jamal on falsifying medical records all on his own. Meanwhile, Jamal is still taking pain meds with booze and that's a no-no.

Angelo shows up to Tiana's live stream of her clapback song, which features some opera (of course), and they talk about how to properly combine their worlds; this song is a pretty good start. Lucious once again feels threatened by Angelo and, in a flashback, tells him all about how she got the nickname Cookie (he just decided it) and how he beat up poor Barry, who may or may not have ended up as President of the United States one day.

This whole Nessa mess doesn't bode well for Becky, who doesn't get the promotion she was hoping for. Instead, Cookie hires Xavier "the white guy who thinks he's black," and he's the worst. Even worse: Shyne declares war on the Lyons and Nessa visits Andre. They. Hook. Up.

And Ghost Rhonda helps him in what is surely the most bizarre supernatural threesome ever.

Next: The World Series! Then more Empire.

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